Blue Horizons Support Group
Helping You Make Life Transitions
Dr. Ajai Blue-Saunders
Faith & Grief Podcast
Our latest episode of the podcast is available today, featuring Speaking Grief, director/producer, Lindsey Whissel Fenton & Ajai Blue-Saunders, who is featured in the documentary and multi-platform project.
Speaking Grief is a public media initiative aimed at creating a more grief-aware society by validating the experience of grievers and helping to guide those who wish to support them. Learn more at SpeakingGrief.org.
“Is like the ocean; it comes on waves, ebbing and flowing.
Sometimes the water is calm, and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim”
The Grieving do not just experience the loss of their loved one.
They in some sense loose themselves. They lose security, trust and hope for the future. A person is forever changed after experiencing a loss.
Never the Same
The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not “get over” the loss of a loved one,
You will learn to live with it. You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered.
You will be whole again, but you will never be the same.
Nor should you be the same, nor would you want to.
Joy is on the Horizon
WALKING WITH GRIEF
Do not hurry
As you walk with grief. It does not help the journey.
Walk slowly, do not hurry as you walk with grief.
Do not be disturbed by memories that come unhidden.
Swiftly forgive, and let Christ speak for you unspoken words.
Unfinished conversations will be resolved in Him
To not be disturbed
Be gentle with the one who walks with grief
If it is you, be gentle with yourself
Swiftly forgive, walk slowly, pausing often
Take time, be gentle as you walk with grief.
It’s okay. It’s okay to miss them. It’s okay to say their name.
It’s okay to cry. It’s okay to breathe deeply
It’s okay to smile when you think of them. It’s okay to function.
It’s okay to have days where you can’t function
It’s okay to be angry
It’s okay to love again. It’s okay to remember.
It’s okay to hope. It’s okay to be honest
It’s okay to trust again.
It’s okay, it’s okay, it’s okay
Words to Stand On
The Lord will perfect that which concerns me. Psalms 138:8
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11
I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go;I will counsel you with my loving eye on you. Ps 32:8
As for me, afflicted and in pain-may your salvation, God protect me. Ps 69:29
The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want.He restores my soul. He guides me in the paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. Psalm 23
Show me your ways, Lord, Teach me your paths.
Guide me in your truth and teach me for you are God my Savior, and my hope
Is in you all day long. Psalm 25:4-5
Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for He who promised is faithful. Hebrew 10:23
Deuteronomy 6:5-“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul, and all your strength.”
When you lose some dear and c lose to you- it’s easy to question if God love you or even question if you love God.
As Christians, we struggle with believing that “if God loves us, then we’d have no struggles, have perfect health, have no problems and surely we wouldn’t feel this pain after someone we love has died.”
The truth is we aren’t exempt from grief because we’re saved and love the Lord. Our relationship with God is only made stronger through our trials and troubles. Unlike those who grieve and don’t know Christ, we have Hope. (1 Thessalonians 4:13)
This Hope we have is to know we’ll see our loved ones again in heaven.
But getting to a safe place, a whole place, in the grief journey takes time. It’s not automatic.
God still loves us even in the darkest, ugly days of our grief AND in time we learn to love Him too, again.
When you lose your spouse, your covenant partner, sometimes the pain is too unbearable that it causes you to question the very essence of life. Sometimes we start to question our love for God or even if He still loves us.
God never stopped loving you even through the pain, sorrow and emptiness of grief.
Sure- I know it doesn’t feel like love when you’re hurting, crying and waiting all alone after losing your husband.
God. Loves. You.